Fences

It seems that no matter how good the fences are there is always a way to get out.   Or at least my cows are finding that to be true.  When we bought this place we knew it was a fixer-upper and it is proving to be true.  So all our fences need re-built.  Currently we have a bull who is totally out in the desert looking for some cows.  Our cows climb out of the fences on a regular day for no good reason except that the grass is greener on the other side even though it looks exactly the same to me.  A couple of our cows might go down the road all the way to the market just because they crawl fences.   It has been said many times and many ways that the grass always looks greener on the other side of the fence.  This often seems to be true.   My cows think so and I think we do sometimes too. In our lives it seems that life would be better if . . .  Or if I only had . . . If I had made  . . . . this choice or not made this choice . . . . If I only lived . . . . . or if I didn't have . . . Or if this had not happened.  Sometimes it is easy to look back at life and wonder if it was better.  Or was it just different?  What is Normal?  Normal life is something that seems to be non existent.  Many of my friends wonder what "NORMAL" is.  I wonder what it is. I have decided it I a setting on a washer!  What is normal for one is maybe not for someone else.  I feel like there is a new normal to life.  Would it be normal on the other side of some fence?  And would I really want that normal to be mine?  I think we are all in process of figuring out what our new normal is.  Today we hit one year since my Dad passed away.  Crazy.  I look back and wish I still had him.  So many things I have wanted to talk with him about this last year.  But now that part of my life is past.  I can't just pick up the phone and chat with him.  That is the reality.  Painful but true.  I can't replace that with anything.  I can just keep going down this path.  In this fence.  The grass really would not be any better on the other side of any fence.  Even if my cows continue to think that!