Summer plans

Summer plans So somehow summer snuck up on me this year. I am a bit overwhelmed with the amount of deferred maintenance that we have worked  on a lot over the last few years and still have a ways to go on this ranch. Now it is on the market though and so I would really just like to sell it. Then someone else can deal with it and make it the way they want. I got  big blueprint plans the other day and that was quite exciting. I am ready to start on that project I think. Should be interesting. And a lot of work. But fun too.  It is so weird though to think that Fathers Day is coming up here in a few weeks and my Dad won't be here to celebrate with or  call or anything. It makes my eyes think they need to cry every time I think about that. So weird. Dad won't be coming to any of my sons baseball games. He will not show up at our mine tour. He won't make it to Marvin's wedding. I still keep thinking he will call me up but he hasn't. And won't. And that is hard. I am trying to move on and adjust to my new normal in life. I am not a basket case and crying all the time at all but it interesting to see what crops up that makes my eyes well up. I think the hardest part is wondering if there is another shoe that is dropping soon. Not sure I can handle another one right now. But I listen to the new Mercy Me song about the hurt - us- and the -healer- God colliding and knowing that one day all the tears will be washed away and the scares will be explained and knowing that it really is well with my soul. God does know what He is about. My dad wouldn't come back if he could. He is where he has had his eye fixed on for 40+ years and is loving heaven.  I know it deep down to be true but sometimes my heart still hurts. And I guess that is good. Summer will continue and the seasons will continue to change. The world is still turning. God is still in his heaven and I still trust in Him.